Laos. On a Bike.

“I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.”

– Mark Twain

Heading North

I spent my first full day in Laos on a boat for seven+ hours, slowly trolling up the Mekong river.  Under normal circumstances I would cringe at this idea. This is a very long time on a very slow boat. But you know what….it was alright.  Laos, with it’s serene landscapes and casually chill populace has put me in a zen mood.

It also helps that I’m here with a friend.

I met my former co-worker, current friend and travel companion, Ankit in Phnom Penh at the conclusion of my volunteer work there. Together we made our way from Cambodia to Luang Prabang in central Laos.  This trek involved a few tuk tuk rides, a bus, a plane, and a taxi but I won’t bore you with the details.

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The important factoid is that I’ve departed Cambodia.  This country will always hold a soft spot in my heart after seven weeks of volunteering in Phnom Penh. But my calendar and passport say it’s time for something new.

 Luang Prabang

What a pleasant surprise of a Laotian town.  Luang Prabang is quiet….so very peaceful and quiet.  There’s no busy city buzz, no bright city lights.  The main lighting on the streets comes from the starry sparkle of paper lanterns strung along the waterfront, and the soft glow of open air restaurants and cafes lining the avenues.  This city is such contrast to the hustle and bustle of Phnom Penh, I can barely comprehend it on arrival. It’s like I’ve been holding my breath for the last two months, walked off the plane in Laos and finally took in a lung full of fresh air.

There are real sidewalks here, and they’re used by actual people. For walking. Not for motorcycle parking.  The streets are almost suspiciously clean of crushed up water bottles, plastic bags, and half empty food containers.  No one is in a hurry.

It’s so.  God, it’s so CUTE.  I said this to Ankit probably a dozen or more times.  “It’s so cute here.”  We arrived in Luang Prabang in the early evening, and spent our first few hours on a casual aimless wander around town. The center of the city consists of a peninsula of sorts, flanked by the Mekong and the Nam Khan on either side. In the middle of this is zen like delightfulness.

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Even the local night market is a pleasant surprise of calm social order.  Each decorative scarf, embroidered pillow case, and stack of buddha paintings is neatly arranged in rows of perfectly aligned merchandise.  The haggling, if you can even call it that, is so polite it’s almost off-putting. A person doesn’t even need to speak to negotiate. A single heavy sighed exhale, and some tiny soft spoken Laotian woman will quickly lower the price from 100 to 80 thousand kip before you can ever form a syllable. If you get the chance speak to offer 60, more often than not, she’ll nod agreeably and take it without further discussion. Heaven forbid any one feels slighted in this process. Best not to risk it.

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Two hours in and I’m already dreading leaving Laos. Ankit and I have already discussed the idea that he should flee the US and become the owner and manager of a guest house in Luang Prabang. Here he can have a life of peaceful respite, meeting worldly fascinating guests and entertaining them with his ukulele skills.

Back to the Boat

We don’t have much time to start searching for guesthouses for Ankit to buy, as we are in Laos for a four day cycling tour starting the next morning. Well….in truth it’s actually a three day cycling tour and a one day boat tour. As previously noted, we spent our first full day almost entirely on a boat heading North on the Mekong to the town of Pakbeng.

This could have been a very boring ride, but we are good friends with a lot to catch up on. We talked future career plans (I sure as hell need to figure out mine soon), discussed potential names to call his Laotian guesthouse and/or house boat business, and I showed that I can be very competitive as I death stared him over a game of cards.  It was a long and uneventful ride. but it flew by. I couldn’t have had a better time. 

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And Now…the Cycling

Three days of cycling.  Over 200 kilometers of road to cover. 

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Day one started off a little rough which turned out to be a sign of things to come.  Our tour guide, Ai, forgot to bring the bike helmets.  Let me repeat – our biking tour guide forgot the bike helmets.  He literally has like two things to remember.  Bikes.  And helmets. 

I was not impressed. We had a 90 kilometer day planned on uneven Laotian roads with potholes, narrow shoulders, cattle crossing the street and trucks passing us by.  “No worries” he said. “Sorry about the mistake, but I’m sure you’ll be fine. For me, it’s ok. I don’t need a helmet. Someone will bring helmets for you tomorrow.”

Ai is young. Obviously. You can tell by his attitude of indestructible invincibility that he’s still in his 20’s. But he’s married with two kids, and cycling tour guide for a living. So the idea that he doesn’t wear a helmet on a regular basis when he has one available is downright ridiculous.

The next strike against our young cycling guide came from the fact that he described the first day as ‘comfortable’ and ‘mostly flat’. This proved to be a pack of lies.

The scenery was stunning. But it was rolling hills all day.  Up a hill, down a hill.  Repeat 50 more times.  Around lunch time I confronted Ai’s version of reality – “this is a not flat road” I told him. “Not even close. Flat is like this” – I held out my hand to show it on a level plane.  “The road is nothing like this.  It’s up and down the whole way.“

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“No it’s not.” he confusingly continued to argue.  “This is a flat road.”

 As though repeating this statement this over and over again would make it remotely true.  He continued….”in Laos we have a lot of mountains.  This is flat.”  

Uh huh.  “So this is flat for Laos.”  I shot back at him.  “That’s not the same thing as flat.”

“This is a flat road.”

Ugh. Whatever Ai.  As if I wasn’t slightly annoyed enough, Ai also had the bothersome habit of casually speeding past Ankit and I on the uphill sections while we huffed and puffed our way to the top.  I get that Ai is a biking tour guide and all, and I understand that I’m 10 years older than him. But he didn’t have to be a show off about it. 

By the end of the day Ankit and I finished our 90 kilometers, but we looked pretty rough. If we had made it to 100, I would have needed a walker to get to dinner.  While I like to think I’ve stayed in ok shape over the last eight months, there’s a difference between not getting obese and staying fit.  True, I’ve hiked mountains and clocked quite a few miles on foot in my travels.  But my intake of chocolate bars and evening gelatos has also skyrocketed.  I rarely have the opportunity to run anymore.  There’s no flywheel spin class for me to attend in Phnom Penh. 

At the end of day one my thighs were killing me. 

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We were both nervous for day two which Ai initially described as ‘hilly’ and ‘challenging’.

Day Two: A Literal Breeze

Fortunately for us, our snarky tour guide lost all confidence in our cycling abilities and made the executive decision to cut out the challenging part of day two.  No real uphills anymore.  We will drive to the top of a mountain and bike down.

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DC Cassie in America nine months ago would have balked at this. How dare he reduce the physical challenge, doubting my ability to muscle through and complete the task at hand. But world traveling Cassie is different. I already climbed Kiliminjaro in August. I have nothing to prove here. Screw the physical challenge.  Several hours of cycling straight uphill with no breaks sounds like hell and I paid to be here.

But 30 kilometers of cycling downhill….. that I can handle.

We covered a total of 50 kilometers the second day and it was a literal breeze.   Ankit and I both walked away with a completely false heightened sense of biking athleticism.   Ankit even made it a point to say he could have gone another 20k.

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Laos: A Real Life Bob Ross Painting

One big thing I have learned on this bike tour is that Laos is incredibly picturesque.  The entire country appears to be made entirely of limestone mountains of green and peaceful rivers full of quaint fishing boats.  I’m convinced it’s one of the most beautiful places in the world.

We spent the next night in the town of Nong Khiaw along the Nam Ou River.  The town is a popular stop for hikers and foreign backpackers. It’s charming and lovely. The kind of vision of Asia you get from watching movies like Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, where ninja swordsman are swooping through jungle forests and misty mountaintops. It’s such a cliché view of Asia that I almost can’t believe it exists. 

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We slept in very basic, but perfectly charming huts right along the river front, complete with front porch hammocks where we happily napped away an afternoon. 

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The ride back to Luang Prabang on the last day was a relatively easy 70 kilometers.  I’m totally humble bragging by saying it that way.  A few weeks ago, 70 kilometers was more than I had ever biked in one day ever.  Now, after my cycling marathon it feels no worse than an afternoon spin class.  We covered over 200 kilometers in three days. Personal record.

Despite this, upon arrival in Luang Prabang, Ankit and I made a b-line for a local spa to get massages. The other thing to love about Laos, and SE Asia in general, is the wide availability of $8 massages. For this bargain price, teeny tiny Asian women with the hand strength of pro wrestlers will poke, prod, and dig into every last muscle ache. It’s the best.

One Last Day

Sadly, we only had one day left in Laos before heading to Vietnam.  Ankit and I agreed that we would have liked to have spent more time here.  We were sad to leave, but made the most of our last day by taking a morning yoga class (stretching needed), and visiting the Kuang Si Waterfalls. We haggled our way into a shared van ride to the falls, and once there completed a short but steep climb to the top. It’s a lovely and easy destination just a short drive from the city. The waters are a milky aqua blue from the limestones in the water.  It makes it real purrty for pictures.

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To round out our Loatian visit, Ankit and I participated in a two hour language exchange in a book store in Luang Prabang.  Foreign tourists donate a few hours of their time to help locals practice their English.  The experience is a bit like going on a lot of first dates without the romantic assumptions. There’s a lot of awkward small talk but we both met interesting people. 

Most of the young men I talked to were no older than 20.  They all left homes in distant villages as teenagers to go to school in the city.  Some had an uncle, or sister in the city who they were living with.  Some arrived not knowing another solitary soul, and had to live in dormitories with strangers since they were 14 or 15.  If they’re lucky, the men get to see their family once or twice a year.  However, if their family lives too far away, it might only be every few years due to the expense of traveling. 

Neither Ankit or I met anyone who had ever left Laos – though several expressed a desire to travel and see more of the world.  We covered lots of random topics, and fielded random questions about the US. I got asked about 9/11 by a young man who was more amazed at the idea of a building being so tall than anything else. He’s never seen anything bigger than 5 stories. Ankit also learned a few words of Korean.

These experiences are always good reminders that people are generally similar and are kind and friendly. But we get very different opportunities based on where we are born. If anything, I left with a bigger sense of gratitude for all those things that I can often take for granted.   Like being able to travel far away from where I was born, and spend a week cycling through a beautiful country like Laos.